Captain’s Rules

(Last updated: March 18, 2016)

Gibbs has his rules and I have mine. The only difference is my list will continue to be amended and modified as I get older, I mean wiser.

  1. The captain does not go down with the ship, but he is the last one off.
  2. No Bell Peppers on-board!
  3. If you don’t know how to use the head, ask, I’m not cleaning up your mess.
  4. The sea does not have lawyers, but if you disrespect her, you will be tried.
  5. Sunscreen
  6. Yes we may have the right of way, but I’m not sinking the boat to prove it.
  7. Shipshape and Bristol fashion is a life style.
  8. Don’t always trust GPS, it’s run by the government, know your position.
  9. Carry a knife.
  10. If you don’t know what you are doing on a boat, start bartending.
  11. As a guest: bring rum, be happy, help clean up.
  12. Shoes or bikinis, you can only wear one, choose wisely.
  13. If you don’t want it on the ocean floor take it out of your pocket.
  14. When in doubt take it slooooow, panicking only makes it worse faster.
  15. If you’re having trouble communicating, shouting doesn’t make it any clearer.
  16. Anchoring is both skill and art, always strive for a proficient masterpiece.
  17. If it’s not broken don’t fix it.
  18. Yes, as a matter of fact, everything does have a place.
  19. Pee on the leeward side of the boat.
  20. Lower the volume on the stereo so the captain can see better.
  21. Always check there’s toilet paper before and not after.
  22. Never go to a bar when you’re thirsty.
  23. Rubber bands are for office supplies, Use a rope and tie a knot
  24. Never put a body part between a boat and any object.


  1. Pingback: Bell peppers and other galley taboos. | Island Rambler

Got a Comment?..

Email for verification only, Required*